I decided to stop taking Clomid, and you know what happened? After four weeks I’m no longer a stark raving, short fused, irritable woman. Hallelujah! Who knew? I am still here. It feels good to feel more like myself after six months of posing as another bitchy woman.
Maybe I shouldn’t be so harsh on myself. I believe that you can manifest whatever you set your mind to. So in the Ask and it is Given Learning to Manifest Your Desires (written by Esther and Jerry Hicks) mindset, I will honor my body.
I am working on erasing the thought that I am broken because clearly I am not. I also believe things happen in your life for a reason. Although at this point I can’t fathom the reason to suffer miscarriages and secondary infertility.
I didn’t care for the previous recurring theme in my life of losing a home, which I have, twice. One burned in a fire and the other came tumbling down in an earthquake.
Maybe that’s the pattern. Two similarly terrible things and then I move on to the next. I must be done with the miscarriage thing since I’ve had two. Oh crap…what am I inviting into my world now?
I know…I need to ask for what I want…I’m going to write it down so I know I am being clear…happiness…a healthy pregnancy and a healthy child. I can do it. We all can.