I’m a do what I say kind of girl. It’s inherent in who I am. I like the tenacity it means I have. But it also can lead to frustration when the time between what I say and when the “it” is done is longer than I’d like…which is practically always.
People who know me expect the do what I say trait from me. Yet, I still catch them off guard when I follow through. Two years ago we decided to leave LA. We’d done it before. I’m sure people took bets on the fact that we’d return. But it was out time to go. We left within six moths and built a new life in the South.
I set out to write a book. I have. I am now rewriting and revising it so it’s the best book I can possibly write. The frustrating part is my process is slow. I read that Stephanie Meyer wrote TWILIGHT over one summer. That is dam impressive! It took me eight months to complete my first draft. And it took me eight months previous to figure out what my story was really about. I flailed around with characters and plot. It’s embarrassing to admit.
I so wanted to finish my revisions by February. My new goal is to have it complete and out in the world to agents by the end of August. I not only have to rework some things, I have to write a synopsis and an ass kicking query. Neither is an easy task. Especially for me who becomes rediculously tongue-tied when talking about my book, LIFE-LIKE. Why is that I can be susinct when talking about my writing process but not about the story itself?
I’m too close to the situation. I judge every word coming form my mouth and I cringe when I hear myself stumble over plot when it is so clear in my mind. Is that how other peole get when they say something and mean to do it?
Do they stumble with the how? Do they stumble over the details, the work, and the journey of accomplishment? The old cliche that life is about the journey…is so annoying to me. I like to start and enjoy being finished. The middle part is full of sweat and insecurity. That journey can be frustrating. What in the world is holding you back? And what do you have to lose by trying?
I tell my little girl all the time, “Sometime you have to try and try and try. You can’t always do something the first time your try it. It can be frustrating. But practice and trying is the only way to learn.”
I hope you get all the practice and time to try again and again too.